“You’re welcome,” at least it doesn’t sound like he’s done completely the wrong thing, even though the fear had nagged at him since Max let him know everything was set up.
The real big fear of the moment, overtaking even the idea that he’s messed up too hard to come back from it with Will, is that the moment his parents actually separate Ted is going to withdraw his financial support with college and everything he did from the moment he realised he wasn’t going to get in if he didn’t try at school to now where he’s surrounded by textbooks racing to catch up again will have been pointless. All the seeing his friends, all the times he could have spent hanging out with Lucas or trying to rebuild with Will and he didn’t because he was studying will have been for absolutely nothing.
He doesn’t have enough faith in Ted Wheeler not to be scared either. But that’s for another time.
“Yeah she told me all about it, she really likes you guys.” Okay he’s putting it off, that’s not great. He has to be honest and transparent and he knows it, professional opinions and all that. “Thanks for the offer but I think maybe we need to… I don’t know see each other, before I take you up on it, that’s why I’m staying with Eddie, it means I have somewhere low stress I know I can go if things are all going sour.” There’s no malice in it, his tone is soft and even.
He hadn’t been able to run last time and it was an uneasy sort of peace. He doesn’t know if Will has read the letters or straight up burned them, or if finding out that Mike had figured himself out because it all blew up in his face has nailed more in the coffin than it helped, he just wanted Will to know he’d had his own feelings before he had any clue they were reciprocated so he wouldn’t keep thinking it was pity or inauthentic. What he does know is that if he turns up and cries on Eddie, or even Steve, it’s okay, they’re good at offering support without taking a side.
“I miss you, and I’m trying to sort myself out before I cause more damage than I already have, but I guess I just… I want to try, if that’s what you want too but it’s okay if you don’t,” it’s not okay as such, it would hurt, but it’s not his decision and he doesn’t want his feelings spared at the cost of Wills, “I’m not like totally doing this for you or something, you prompted it but I’m doing it for me, you all keep telling me I don’t deserve to feel like shit all the time and I’ve elected to trust you all and try to fix it. So I’m not trying to make you feel like… I don’t know, like I’ll give up on it if we don’t work out.”
no subject
The real big fear of the moment, overtaking even the idea that he’s messed up too hard to come back from it with Will, is that the moment his parents actually separate Ted is going to withdraw his financial support with college and everything he did from the moment he realised he wasn’t going to get in if he didn’t try at school to now where he’s surrounded by textbooks racing to catch up again will have been pointless. All the seeing his friends, all the times he could have spent hanging out with Lucas or trying to rebuild with Will and he didn’t because he was studying will have been for absolutely nothing.
He doesn’t have enough faith in Ted Wheeler not to be scared either. But that’s for another time.
“Yeah she told me all about it, she really likes you guys.” Okay he’s putting it off, that’s not great. He has to be honest and transparent and he knows it, professional opinions and all that. “Thanks for the offer but I think maybe we need to… I don’t know see each other, before I take you up on it, that’s why I’m staying with Eddie, it means I have somewhere low stress I know I can go if things are all going sour.” There’s no malice in it, his tone is soft and even.
He hadn’t been able to run last time and it was an uneasy sort of peace. He doesn’t know if Will has read the letters or straight up burned them, or if finding out that Mike had figured himself out because it all blew up in his face has nailed more in the coffin than it helped, he just wanted Will to know he’d had his own feelings before he had any clue they were reciprocated so he wouldn’t keep thinking it was pity or inauthentic. What he does know is that if he turns up and cries on Eddie, or even Steve, it’s okay, they’re good at offering support without taking a side.
“I miss you, and I’m trying to sort myself out before I cause more damage than I already have, but I guess I just… I want to try, if that’s what you want too but it’s okay if you don’t,” it’s not okay as such, it would hurt, but it’s not his decision and he doesn’t want his feelings spared at the cost of Wills, “I’m not like totally doing this for you or something, you prompted it but I’m doing it for me, you all keep telling me I don’t deserve to feel like shit all the time and I’ve elected to trust you all and try to fix it. So I’m not trying to make you feel like… I don’t know, like I’ll give up on it if we don’t work out.”